Saturday, August 7, 2010

Kindergarten Blues

My baby is going to school.

All summer long, Elle has told me how excited she is to start kindergarten, to go to school with her brothers, and carry a lunch box and backpack.

I have been secretly excited, too.

Six hours a day to whatever I please, to get all of those things done that have seemed so impossible with a child attached to me. Freedom.

With only two days left until the school year begins, Elle and I both are having second thoughts.

She told me yesterday that she doesn't want to go. She doesn't know where to line up. She won't have any friends in her class. She's going to get lost. But, most importantly, she won't have Mom.

Twice, I've sent a child off to kindergarten without a tear or even a second look back.

Something is different.

Elle is my youngest. She's my little buddy. And, she'll probably be my last.

I'm not sure I'm ready for her to go.

From the time she was born, I was a single mom. She gave me something to wake up for everyday. Elle is my little rock and my security blanket.

It will be strange not to feel her tugging at me all day long, but I guess it's time for the both of us to spread our wings a little.

I know Elle. In no time, she will be in love with her teacher, recess, the little boy who sits next to her. She will be fine.

And, I'm sure in time, the little ache deep inside me will go away.


Kristy Treible said...

This is so sweet Sara. I can't believe your going to have no kids left at home! I am kinda jelous! Cute Picture!

Leigh said...

Trust me, girl. You're going to be sad for about the first week... :)

Lindsey Wood-Felstead said...

How on earth could you have all your kids in school? Where did the time go? It just doesn't seem right! Case is super excited for Kindergarten too. I told him to look for Elle on the playground so they can play together. I'm sure he will find that cute girl 2 seconds after they get there! Can't wait to hear what you are going to do with your "free" (haha) time!

Keri said...

Oh, sweet little Elle looks so adorable in that picture! Good luck to both of you!

Melissa said...

My youngest is 8. I am still not over them all being gone all day. That doesn't mean I am not happy, just still trying to reinvent myself somehow. I like being needed and tugged on. I guess life just keeps changing and there is nothing you can do about it but go with it and smile! Hang in there!

Jacey said...

Oh, Sara...that is so sweet and made ME tear up! You'll LOVE having free time and being able to get things done and you'll cherish that time after school and the weekends with them even more! I sure do! :)