My baby is going to school.
All summer long, Elle has told me how excited she is to start kindergarten, to go to school with her brothers, and carry a lunch box and backpack.
I have been secretly excited, too.
Six hours a day to whatever I please, to get all of those things done that have seemed so impossible with a child attached to me. Freedom.
With only two days left until the school year begins, Elle and I both are having second thoughts.
She told me yesterday that she doesn't want to go. She doesn't know where to line up. She won't have any friends in her class. She's going to get lost. But, most importantly, she won't have Mom.
Twice, I've sent a child off to kindergarten without a tear or even a second look back.
Something is different.
Elle is my youngest. She's my little girl...my buddy. And, she'll probably be my last.
I'm not sure I'm ready for her to go.
From the time she was born, I was a single mom. She gave me something to wake up for everyday. Elle is my little rock and my security blanket.
It will be strange not to feel her tugging at me all day long, but I guess it's time for the both of us to spread our wings a little.
I know Elle. In no time, she will be in love...in love with her teacher, recess, the little boy who sits next to her. She will be fine.
And, I'm sure in time, the little ache deep inside me will go away.
I am counting down the days until the wedding.
